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<table class="hehead"><tr><td align="left">VOLUME III</td><td align="right">ISSUE 1</td></tr></table>
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<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/S3YZLjA.png"></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">an editorial</div> j. monroe</td></tr></table>
<p>Summer's approaching, the school year is finally coming to an end, and I know exactly what you're thinking. "But James," you want to say, "how am I supposed to cram as much Hogwarts enjoyment as I can into the next few weeks?" Excellent question, Reader Who Now Wonders How I Can Read Minds. If you're a younger student, never fear! You've got loads and loads of time left to take in everything there is to offer around here. Trust me, you haven't seen the half of it yet. Really, for you lot, you just need to pick a direction and start walking. You'll bump into something in no time. Trust me, I'm an expert.
<p>If you're a seventh year who will be leaving us soon, I've got bad news for you. Don't even bother, mate. You've already failed. You've failed in the most basic task of being a student. No, no, forget homework, forget NEWTs, forget all that. Well, okay, don't forget all that, you should probably be studying right now. But those aren't my point. My point is curiosity, my friends. You're supposed to have some. That's your job right now. I guess it's kind of a crummy job, since it doesn't pay actual money and, no matter how good you are at it, you get fired at the end of seven years regardless. So... actually, it's nothing at all like a job. All right. New metaphor. I haven't got one. We'll make due.
<p>There are these sad sacks around who do nothing but study or hang out in the common room like that's all there is. Merlin's beard, guys, I know it's called school, but you're just being ridiculous now.
<p>That said, it's the end of the school year, and for some of us it's the end of a chapter in our lives. And whether you're moving on or staying put, your life's continuing to chug along. Don't Make It Boring. Honestly, do you think I have time to track you down later to knock sense into all of you?
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<td class="doubletitle"><div class="title2">advice column</div> h. berkwood & t. findlay</td>
<p><div class="ask">Dear loves of my life,
<br>I seem to have misplaced my face.
<p>Yes, my <i>face</i>.
<p>Can anyone help me find it?
<p><b>H —</b> Hmm. Are you sure that you've looked everywhere? Under your bed? Behind the sofa in the common room? Behind the other sofa in the common room? Did maybe it fall off during breakfast? I guess the more important question is--how are you going to find it if you can't see it? (You've lost your eyes, too, right? Those are in your face.) I'm going to suggest enlisting a friend's help. They probably know what your face looks like and where you might leave it. Good luck!
<p><b>T —</b> DETECTIVE FINDLAY IS ON THE CASE! Perhaps you should begin where you last saw your face—in the mirror, perhaps, at the end of the day? Left crumpled up by the side of the sink after a tiring day of Hogwarts? Or perhaps it has fallen behind your nightstand, slipped there during the night. Or—aha!—curled up in the common room, warming itself by the fire. Another case solved by Detective Findlay.
<p><div class="ask">Dear Advicers,
<p>So, hypothetically speaking, let's say one of the dungeons exploded. Purely on accident. How would one go about fixing things?
<br>Possibly On Fire</div>
<p><b>H —</b> My lawyer says I shouldn't answer this question. But for the record, reparo works really well on broken tables. At least, that is what I've read.
<p><b>T —</b> You came to the right person. First off, you need to douse yourself in water. Trust me, burns are not fun. Nope. Second, you need to get rid of the evidence, whether that means firecrackers, potions, or Blast-Ended Skrewts. Lastly, if you are good at Charms, charm the dungeons back to normal. If you aren’t, beg one of your friends who is to do it instead. If that still doesn’t work, run. Fast.
<p><div class="ask">Dear Tam and Harry,
<p>I've been dating this guy for a few months now. I really like him, and things seem to be going okay, but... his brother's the biggest jerk I have ever met. Like, goes out of his way to make me miserable jerk-y. I don't know what I'm supposed to do.
<p>-Kind of Desperate</div>
<p><b>H —</b> Well, honestly, if things are going well with your boyfriend otherwise, I wouldn't worry too much about his brother. The guy sounds like a real jerk, but he's not the one you're in a relationship with. If things are actually that bad, maybe you should just bring it up to your boyfriend. You could do it real casual-like, "hey, your brother's seemed kind of snippy lately. Is everything okay with him?" Then it's more like you're showing concern, giving the benefit of the doubt, and not attacking his brother or anything.
<p>Or you could head over to Zonko's and find something good to prank him with. Up to you really.
<p><b>T —</b> You just gotta ignore him. You’re in a relationship with your boyfriend, not his brother, and although it’s true that you want to get along with his family and that’s probably important to him, you’re not going to be living with him or anything like that. Eventually, someone will call him out for his jerky behavior. Or you can talk to your boyfriend and he’ll probably talk to his brother.
<p><div class="ask">Dear Hogwarts Express,
<br>There's a girl that I really like and I don't know if I should tell her or not! We're friends too but I don't want to mess it up...and the problem is we're both girls so she probably doesn't even like me back. What do I do?!
<p><b>H —</b> Going to be honest, here. I haven't the slightest clue. Let me know if you figure it out.
<p><b>T —</b> Well, I dunno what to tell you, actually, seeing as I have a problem telling people I like them too. It’s normal to feel that way, I guess, but sometimes, you gotta just TAKE THE RISK and GO FOR IT! Who knows? Maybe she’ll surprise you! Good luck!
<p><div class="ask">Dear advice givers,
<br>I'm new to the school and I feel like it's really hard to get to know everybody. They're already in their own little cliques. What advice could you give?
<p><b>H —</b> Aww, it's not so hard getting to know people. Let me tell you what I do... no, never mind. What I do usually involves doing something weird that gets me noticed. That might not be your cup of tea. Okay. You know parties and event things that people are announcing all the time? Or you hear them talk about? Go to those. Talk to random people. Or, I don't know, talk to people you have classes with. Hell, look for someone else who seems like they don't have a lot of people to talk to. Maybe they're shy and need a hand there. We all had to figure out how to interact with these strange people, too!
<p><b>T —</b> First of all, welcome to Hogwarts! I’m sure you’ll enjoy it as much as I do. We’re really a nice bunch of people, although it can be kind of intimidating. Try talking to someone in one of your classes! Your Potions partner, maybe? Although you do need to concentrate on Potions otherwise that stuff gets away from you…literally! Just give it time, I’m sure you’ll make a connection soon and make tons of friends! And if you still have trouble…well, look me up! I’d love to get to know you!
<td class="hearticle"><div class="acontent"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/RPK6Ehq.png"></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">features</div> v. olett</td></tr></table>
<p>Hey everybody and I hope you’re enjoying the rekindling of the Hogwarts Express so far! I’m Kanya and I’ll be writing your Features article from here on out. What you can expect to see here are comments on key happenings around Hogwarts—as well as a few articles featuring our amazing faculty, staff, and students! Have an idea for something you’d like to see featured? Feel free to owl me.
<p>This time around, we’ll be featuring the lovely Mama Mahalia (as she insists on me calling her, and I’m fairly certain she’ll cane me if I don’t) and her great new choir program here at Hogwarts. For those of you that might be interested in the program please take the time to talk to Miss Monroe as I’m sure she’d be more than excited to tell you all about it and get you started. In fact, Mahalia has been in choir since early childhood. Don’t take her for a simple church girl though—this sassy mama also has her degree in Choral Education and has been conducting for around 18 years. If you ever have questions about singing, or choir, this is the woman to talk to. Mahalia went into college with the goal to save lives. Originally thinking of medicine, this quirky lady soon found out that she could patch up wounds with medicine—but she could save people emotionally, spiritually, and mentally through the power of music. I’m sure quite a few of you out there have felt the uplifting effects of your favorite song on a bad day—or even had a good breakup anthem help out during rough times. Whatever it is that music does for you, it’s obvious that it does something.
<p>This year Mahalia is going for an eclectic feel. She states that “…everyone comes from different backgrounds. It’s important to be as diverse musically as we all are as people.” This year’s selections will include gospel, classical, some upbeat jazz and pop along with so much more to appreciate. For those of you with a not-so-musical inclination, Mahalia is planning choral concerts in the school theatre, pending some practice and paperwork. Still, don’t be afraid to sign up for this new group on campus. Especially you boys! As Mahalia said in her interview “choirs are always short on boy, but… it’s not short on pretty ladies.” So I hearten all of you to check out the new program and hey—maybe let us know what you think here at the Hogwarts express. As a last note, some final encouragements from Mama Mahalia herself: “Come as you are and we’ll gladly use your gifts! Not to mention: Delicious treats are served after each rehearsal.”
<td class="hearticle"><div class="acontent"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/i23rlGA.png"></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">lou's potluck</div> l. esco</td></tr></table>
<p>So the other day, I was eating breakfast. I had smoked sausage, bacon, eggs, and some of that fried ham. Pretty much, I had a plate full of every animal you could find on a farm, sans the horse. The entire time I was eating I had this petite little girl sitting across from me reading me an 'Animal Rights' flier that she'd apparently been posting around the school. She kept telling me that the animals I was eating had feelings and crap. Needless to say, she got kind of mad when I said, “Not anymore.” She kept going on and on about how 'killing animals is wrong.' What does she want me to do? Eat them alive? Long story short, it gave me an idea. It dawned on me that I belong to the most animal loving house in Hogwarts. Hell, I've seen Leona Santos try and steal assignments from COMC (sorry, lovely). So I thought, maybe I could review all this 'vegan' stuff that my fellow puffs are so fond of.
<p>After a long search in the library (and single minded determination to prove that Animal Rights brat wrong) I found quite a few interesting things. No, I'm not talking about 'you'll save animals' or anything. I'm talking about the health benefits. Here's what I found:
Now, we all know that certain foods can have E coli or Salmonella, but what I'm talking about are the more hardcore diseases. The ingestion of more fruits and grains can greatly reduce the risk of high blood pressure, diabetes, and even certain types of cancers such as breast cancer, colon cancer, and prostate cancer. I'm not sure about women and their breasts, but I know that men are rather fond of their prostates.
According to... that... book I read... of which title I can't remember... people who eat more fruits, veggies, nuts, and grains have healthier skin. They have less blemishes and discoloration in their skin. It will also make nails stronger and healthier as well. Vegans are also known to have healthier hair. The less meat intake they have, the shinier and stronger their hair becomes.
<p>Of course, weight loss:
This one was kind of a given, but I thought I'd mention it anyways. It's no mystery that fruits and veggies are healthier than meat. I'm sure we all have someone in our lives who said something like, “Eat something healthier, like a salad.” Weight loss is a big effect when you're vegan because, let's face it, when you eat meat, you're eating all the weight that little sucker's put on.
According to a lot of people who don't take much into the idea of vegetarianism, Vegans are very weak from the lack of protein. That's not true. At least not when it comes to someone who knows how to substitute the benefits of meat while, at the same time, getting rid of negative effects. Whole grain and nuts are very high in proteins. The same goes for certain veggies such as peas, artichokes, sweet potatoes, mushrooms, and broccoli.
<p>So yes, if you're reading this, Animal Rights jerk... I appreciate your vegan lifestyle more than I did when I told you that people did like to put asparagus on the grill at barbeques. I might even try this a little bit myself. Not during bacon hour of course, but I will probably read a little more into this.
</div></td><td class="hearticle"><div class="acontent"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/0R6OWlz.png"></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">health tip</div> n. sweeney</td></tr></table>
<p>Nowadays it seems that people have given up on trying to help themselves out when they get injured. Sure, I have my fair share of important cases, where someone's broken a bone or has contracted a relatively serious disease, but most days my life is spent fixing up nosebleeds, broken fingernails and chipped teeth. It's a long and monotonous lifestyle, and thus to prevent my own slow descent into insanity, I'm deciding to educate you all on just how to fix your own menial problems using things you might not realise could be used as “medicine”.
<p>Headaches & Migraines:
Fairy wings are coated in a light film of Fairy Dust, which usually has to be boiled in a cauldron in order to be used to its full potential. However, via use of a quick Glacius
spell, the wings can be frozen and the fairy dust seeps out into the air, which when breathed in can reduce the severity of headaches and migraines. To avoid having to carry around a pair of frozen fairy wings and breathe in deeply around them until your headache subsides, try sleeping or napping with them on your bedside drawer or next to your pillow. This isn't advised students who suffer with breathing difficulties, however, or those who are prone to asthma.
Chewing on a mixture of Silverweed and daisies can relieve you from your throat infection, and can also take the weight off any chest tightness and coughing, but be aware that if Silverweed and daisies are chewed for too long they can temporarily stain teeth yellow.
Now, I know a lot of people who seem to think that Sleeping Droughts are the way to go when you can't sleep. No.
Sleeping Droughts are great and all, but the mixture of Flobberworm Mucus and Valerian Sprigs can often lead to bouts of Tonsillitis and Sinusitis. I recommend drinking copious amounts of Honeywater before your bedtime. Though Honeywater is used in Waking Potions, when used in large amounts it can completely reverse its effect and make the user fall asleep, without the throat and sinus infections that come hand-in-hand with Sleeping Droughts.
<p>Cuts and Grazes:
Oh God, the amount of times I've had a patient who only needed me to give them a plaster. Please, people! To seal a cut almost instantaneously, try applying Billywig Sting Slime to the wounded area. Though it will hurt – a lot
– this will only be for seconds, if that, and then your cut will be completely healed. This is because the slime on a Billywig's stings contain tiny microscopic bacteria that help keep its stingers clean and ready to attack. These little bacteria love being on wizards and witches, so they eat up all the cut and damaged skin and run off, leaving behind their naturally curative slime and allowing the cut to heal more than five times its usual rate.
<p>That's all for this issue, but I'll be back next time with some more helpful cures for your everyday ailments. Also, don't be afraid to drop me an owl if you have any medical worries you feel you'd like to share, as I'm happy to help in all and any areas of disease, illness and wounds.
</div></td><td class="hearticle"><div class="acontent"><table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/DlH2PHa.png"></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">quidditch</div> j. kim</td></tr></table>
<p>Quidditch made a much-anticipated comeback this term with the match between the Slughorn Slurpees and Diricawl Dynamos! Meeting on a clear but breezy day, the two teams faced off in what was quickly to become one of the most foul-ridden, injury-inducing games in the past few years.
<p>A number of terribly exciting things, including a three-way collision, a black eye, a Transylvanian Tackle gone wrong and a memorable vomiting incident created tension throughout the Pitch and the stands. Healers Woodbane and Little worked tirelessly to ensure that the players would be able to function until they at least got themselves to the Hospital Wing afterwards. Throughout the game the two teams presented an exciting battle as the Quaffle was passed in a scarlet blur around the Pitch, making their Keepers work to pull off miraculous saves in order to keep the scores neck to neck.
<p>The tension peaked when Dynamo Seeker Olett surged towards the ground in order to catch the Golden Snitch - which, as you all know, awards 150 points to whichever team catches it and therefore typically ensures victory on the Pitch. At the same time the Slurpee Seeker was unfortunately bludgeoned by a Bludger. Naturally, the Dynamos won the game, but not without a cost, as more than half the team sustained mildly serious injuries.
<p><b>OUTSIDE HOGWARTS —</b> Tutshill Tornado Chaser Johnson has secured a position on the English national team. The upcoming Quidditch World Cup, which will take place next July, will have tickets on sale starting August 30th. In other news, Pride of Portree will be having a match against the Wigtown Wanderers this weekend. For tickets, please contact the Local Office of Games and Sports in Hogsmeade.
<p>The Hogwarts Express would like to extend congratulations to the Dynamos and gratitude to the Slurpees for a thrilling match!
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<table cellspacing="0" cellpadding="0"><tr><td><img src="http://i.imgur.com/hUx8lV8.png"/></td><td class="titleinfo"><div class="atitle">may 2013 horoscopes</div> e. bolstridge</td></tr></table>
<p>Far above the sky we see are planets in continuous motion. Even our earth---that planet you're standing on---moves along in circular motion with the rest of the solar system. It's in this movement that we can predict certain things about ourselves, or about how our lives may go in the following hours, days, or month. Below you'll find snippets of how this month--the month of May--is predicted to go for the 12 star signs. *Disclaimer: The following information is diluted and spread to generalize about each of the signs. For more accurate predictions, birth times and dates specific to the person are required.
May brings our feisty rams to a bit of a stop, assuming they're the kind of ram to fret over their knuts and sickles. Maybe last month got you into a jam from all that spending you did on butterbeers and pumpkin pastries; or maybe you got robbed. Either way, this month is a good chance for you to, possibly, gain back some money. We're entering the part of the month where financial decisions will offer you the most opportunities, so hurray for that. Don't be stupid with these chances, else you'll find yourself in more serious trouble than you might have been in before. Business inquiries are going to have a major influence on you guys right now, but don't take that as a reason to sit back and crawl into yourselves while you wait for the planets to realign. Take charge of your decisions, be smart---or as smart as you possibly can be---about what you invest in (or don't invest in) and use your better judgement when faced with luxuries that might just fall more under "wants" than "necessities." If you're careful and smart, you'll ride out of this month in style, lugging around a hefty bag of money that you can gloat about to all your friends. If you happen to be unwise... Well. Let's hope you've got some friends or family to bail you out, and keep your fingers crossed for what June has in store for you lot.
Introverted Taureans are going to love this month, as May sees the sun in your 1st house of self. What this means is that, if you're looking for some personal development in your life, <b>now</b> is the time to work on that. It should be noted that there are other things in motion here, things that will specifically put a strain on your relationships or partnerships. This makes sense, as you lot will be focused on yourselves, and some people are just too clingy and needy to let you be. Ignore these people if they're expendable. This is <b>your</b> life and your time to look over your own personal goals, see where you're at with them, and maybe make some readjustments if needed. Or, set new goals for yourself. Whatever it is you find yourself needing or doing, don't let others hinder you if they aren't important. Now, if they are... Well, you have to do some balancing. The good thing here is that, the people who make you feel most comfortable in life will be obvious during this time. You'll want to gravitate towards these people more as they'll nurture your personal journey this month. There may be some difficulties in terms of money, as your desires will be empowered this month, but if you're smart and don't over due anything, you'll be good. Really, just take a little time to look at your needs and goals this month. If something isn't working, change it. If things are fine, embrace them, but set them right back aside as you continue to examine all aspects of your personal life this month. You'll benefit from this if you give yourself the time, and if you have the willpower to go on this "spiritual" journey.
I'll be frank with you Geminis---May can potentially suck for you guys. It may start out being relatively quiet and calm, but don't fool yourselves if you know things are going on in the background. And quit being oblivious or in denial about things if you aren't aware of what's going on in your lives. Use the calmness of the first half of this month to get yourself together and prepare for the changes in your life that you'll probably need to make. Things that you've maybe been unsure of will clear up as the month progresses, and lucky for you, you'll be getting a cosmic boost in energy to actually deal with things. So take advantage of this boost, and take advantage of the fact that you'll inherit some effective communication skills from the planets above. Fix what's broken, enjoy your romantic life (if you have one) while it's easy and straightforward to you this month, and just don't freak out for that short time of the month where things have the greatest potential to go South. (Think of that time as your cosmic PMS cycle. What seems like it could be the end of your world won't be as long as you take things in stride and remind yourself that, "you're just pmsing.") You'll find some well-desired peace straight after---during the last weeks of May---where you'll be able to bounce back from whatever crap storm went your way. But don't get hasty. Use the last part of the month to feed off that regenerating energy and just wait for June to roll around. Trust me, you'll be better off taking things slow for that time. Don't wanna over exert yourself, after all.
There's not much I can say for you guys, but May's gonna be a busy one. You'll be here and there, doing whatever it is you do and best of all, at least for the start of the month, you'll be enjoying it. Indulge in that time where you'll be stimulated and joyous because the middle of the month will start to see some strain in your personal relationships. See, you'll be in such demand in certain areas of your life that for many of your friends, partners and family members, you'll come off as irksome. Maybe it's envy, maybe it's just them being cranky. Whatever it is, you'll start to get stressed out, and there's not much else you can do but start to consider making some changes in your life. Don't take that as a "right, need to cut people out" sort of thing. Just <i>consider</i> changes you can make that will end up with the betterment of your life. Take the latter part of the month to mull things over. Issue yourself a "time-out" of sorts, and do your best to actually utilize that time to relax a bit and figure your life out. Consider your goals, consider what you'd like to accomplish for the remainder of the year, and figure out what steps you'd like to begin taking in June to start everything off on the right foot. Best of luck to you Cancers. It can be rough, but well worth your time to work things out for yourselves now before things get even worse.
The spotlight is on you this month, Leos, so go ahead and show us what you're all capable of! Be ambitious, be your natural bold selves, and take pride in what you accomplish this month. But you won't just be faced with things that can advance your careers (or academics), or even of just your social lives. You'll also have opportunities to accomplish things that will make you <i>happy.</i> Enjoy those. I mean it. Because as with the previous star signs, you'll get your fair share of bumps as the month progresses. You may see a fair rise in emotions as a side-effect from the Lunar Eclipse, but this can be a good thing. For example, if you're lucky to find yourself in a good relationship this month (or happen to already been in one), then your romantic life will be in for quite the wild ride in the best possible sense. Like I said though, take care not to be fooled by people you may have just met or by any happenings in your current relationship as you may just indirectly (or even directly) cause things to turn sour. The last part of the month will see your return into the scene of a true socialite, so have fun there, and, hey... There's a good chance of meeting somebody new this month to fill your otherwise lonely heart, so... Go for it. Roar for that item you set your eyes on because you may just find yourself in a very good situation.
No more hiding behind those essays or exams for you Virgos. This month, you'll be distracted with your deepest desires surfacing just enough for you to notice them more, and my advice is to go for them. May will be a fairly easy going month for you as long as you don't have kids or share your finances with other jerks, so use this month, and that heightened sense of adventure that it gives you, to go out there and explore. Explore your capabilities, explore that corridor that you've always wanted to pass through, and just enjoy the spirit of adventure while it lingers. Intimate relationships might suffer during this time, but honestly, you probably need the break. Just take it, go do what you've maybe had the urge to do, but never have had the actual motivation to do, and relax and enjoy yourself. You'll likely get some opportunities to be praised or stand out academically, so if you're in the mood for working towards that, now is a good time for you guys. Other than that... Just have fun you guys, because in comparison to the other signs, you lot will have the most easy-going time in May. You know, if you can toss aside a partnership for a bit, or for forever. But a good partner should be understanding of your desires, so if they're worth it, they won't make things difficult for you, and they may even join you on your wild explorations.
Money and partnerships will be your focus for May, Libras, so get some protective gear on as it'll be a bumpy ride. First and foremost, settle your debts. Or collect what's owed to you, if you happened to be the sort to lend out every last knut you have. Then, move on to your relationship, if you have one. There, the only good advice here is to quit fretting over whatever is <i>wrong</i> and try to stay positive. It might be hard, I know, but you'll end up mucking things up more if you act so negative. All you'll want to do this month is enjoy what you've earned, or what you've been rewarded with, so if you want to actually have time for that, don't be a pack of jerks. Don't over think things, don't feel like you need everything solved at the very second where a problem arises---just don't. Keep yourselves sharp, as others may try to take advantage of you this time, but again, don't stress yourselves too much. If you guys can keep things together till the end of the month, you'll be rewarded with some well-deserved peace. If you so happen to succeed in pursuing these peaceful times, that is.
Alright, so listen up carefully you guys. This month it'll be important for Scorpios to listen to their close friends or relatives in regards to where they think your next steps in life should be. If you've been struggling, seek out help and guidance from these people, and actually <i>listen.</i> If you've not been having problems, then consider seeking out some guidance anyway---perhaps on things you've been unsure about? Right now, it'll be the best time for you guys to get some outside help, so use that to your advantage. Don't take every piece of advice you might get blindly, but it's important to acknowledge any and all help you may get with a problem, lest you begin to feel inadequate or unsupported. Take this as a reminder that you guys need close relationships with people just like everyone else, and maybe try to repair old relationships that maybe didn't work out for whatever reason. Revelations about things like money and your personal life may surface towards the end of the month, if you guys are lucky.
For you guys, I wanna start with the last few days of the month. Basically, it'll be awesome for you guys if you wish to pursue better relationships with the partners you currently have, or if you decide to seek out companionship at all. But don't just take that for intimate relationships. You can easily apply it to generally close relationships that will, or can, surface in these times. Now, I bring this up first because the weeks leading up to that happy time will be relatively rough. At the beginning, you'll be stuck with boring work from school, but if you can stick it out, you'll notice your social life peak a bit. Don't go overboard though. And don't be so anti-fun either. What you'll need for a great time is proper balance between your willingness to work on things, and your opportunities to have some good old fashion fun. This is key for your survival through this month, so do your best. And don't none of you say you weren't warned if you happen to fail at keeping up in one aspect of your life, 'cause I did warn you guys just right now.
Capricorns, if you've been concerning yourselves with pleasurable things, we won't see much of a difference this month. You'll still be indulging in romance---if this happens to be pleasurable to you---though it is advised not to take things too seriously. Just have fun with love if you happen to be in, and you'll be free of any traps. Now, the two eclipses this month---the solar eclipse and a lunar eclipse---will bring about different things for you lot. Firstly, the solar eclipse is more likely to affect your romantic life or your hobbies, and your creativity along with those. You may have something entirely new and unexpected happen in those areas of your life, but the good thing is, you've got a high chance of actually likely these changes. The second eclipse, however, dives deeper into your personal life, shedding some light on things that you may have been avoiding up till now. Fix those things as soon as you can. There's seriously no point in putting things off anymore. Other than those warnings, you all should feel fairly well about yourselves this month, so enjoy it.
May has the potential to be very good for you, Aquarius. While there will be the potential for bad times---particularly with your family life and any sudden changes that may occur there---you guys will be fine, for the most part. That is, assuming that you guys can keep your mouths shut and think before you sputter anything out in response to negative things. Take things somewhat slowly you guys. Think before you act, don't make such a big fuss about things you may not be in favor of, and you'll find May to be a good time, both in your personal life and in your romantic one as well. The latter will especially bloom as we draw closer to the end of the month. If you're in a committed relationship right now, you'll be presented with signs of the importance of this relationship, and if you aren't in one at the moment, you'll have the chance to find that special somebody if you look in the right places. Take May as an easy month, don't fret or fight about things that you needn't worry yourselves over, and look out for that special someone. If you handle yourselves well, you'll find May to be quit the decent month.
Busy, busy bees you Pisces will be for this month. If it's not the workload you'll get from classes, it's the work you'll get from extracurricular activities or commitments you've made to others. While the work will be piling up for you guys, just try to pull through. The past few years may have been difficult with changes here and there, but this'll be one of the last months where you'll be pushed to make serious changes. You're more or less at an end of an era of constant changes here, Pisceans, so finish strong. You'll reap the benefits soon enough. At the end of the month, you should start to see a bit more peace and togetherness with yourself and your friends or close loved ones, so keep on looking forward to any plans you may have for the start of summer as you work through these tough times. Remember, whatever changes may come your way are meant for improvement. You are in control of your own lives, too, so get a grip, do what you need to do, and you'll be on your way to success.
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<td class="doubletitle"><div class="title2">gossip<i>!</i></div> l. santos & m. woodbane</td>
<p>Ahh, my friends! I hope everyone is happy to have the <i>Hogwarts Express</i> back! We aren’t here to talk about that, though. We have much more exciting things to go over! First, my name is the Fiesta Orange Muffin (or just Leona if you want) and I will be spying on everyone. Haha, I’ve already found really good gossip by doing this, so I hope you all enjoy what all my work got me! ♥
<p>Spring term – the term of love! Um, well okay, every term is the term of love for me, but this time I mean it for other people! People like a certain “pikey” honey badger and a “sort of hard to talk to” badger boy. I heard that these two were seen at a little place in Hogsmeade together, giving each other those funny goggly eyes. They spent some time together there before mysteriously sneaking off to some unknown place!! What could they have gone to do?... I don’t know so use your imaginations.
<p>If you don't like love, please set out a basket of orange muffins in the Great Hall so I can come and find you and help you with this problem. But also have a bit of gossip that has no romance at all: <i>Louin Esco is possibly maybe poisoning the banana bread.</i> Whose banana bread? I don't know. Does he really do this? I still don't know, I'm not a mind-reader and I have never accepted banana bread from anybody. But you were the one who didn't want another romance-related story so there you go.
<p>So back to romance, my beautiful friends! ♥ I heard from some very good sources <s>my boyfriend and myself</s> that our Ravenclaw prefect - this Italian beauty - has been seen together-<i>together</i> with another little Ravenclaw whom I discovered is often called the "strange plant girl." I have seen this girl before, and she doesn't really look a lot like a plant, but whoever grew her must have been really great at gardening because she looks <i>really</i> human to me. But the big question here is: Can humans and plants come together and love each other forever?... I think so, because we need them to breathe. But I guess we will all be standing by and watching as this interesting pair of human person and plant person keep being romantic together.
<p>Okay, okay. So away from romance <i>again.</i> I have heard things that might be scary for people, I don't know. We'll see I guess. But the people who I hired to spy for me while I was sick some weeks ago told me that they saw Hufflepuffs. Hufflepuffs who were <i>fighting</i> with <i>each other.</i> I'm so sorry if this is too scary for people. I have some better news though! I've also heard that the normally cold, but very gorgeous, Slytherins have been coming together as friends more. Um, well some of them, anyway. Isn't it nice to see Slytherins being friends with Slytherins? They're like pairs of really, really attractive fish. It's so cute! Please, everyone, hug the next Slytherin you see so you can witness the cuteness of friendly Slytherins yourselves!
<p>My friends, my friends! If you don't want to hug a Slytherin (I don't know why you wouldn't want this), then please help escort them to places because it seems like they get lost easily! One little Slytherin girl couldn't even find her way back to her own room! It's so sad and awful that I cried almost three times after I got this story. Please, please, please help the Slytherins find their way around the castle and to their rooms, because I don't want them to get hurt. And also I heard that this girl woke up some other Slytherin who didn't turn out to be too happy. We have to keep these guys from eating each other, otherwise, who will we all stare at during class and out of class?
<p>The professors of Hogwarts have been a little strange, I hear. One made their class dress up as weird things, only to make them go to the Forbidden Forest, while I heard another was seen <i>smoking</i>. I don't know what he smoked. Maybe it was a salmon. Smoked salmon is really good. But he didn't invite me or my friends to this "smoking" party, so I don't know what to think. Um. Oh, yes, and I guess there was another student with him. I can only guess she had some smoked salmon too since she was talking to the professor. I don't know my friends, but I think if we all need to really get together and throw a cooking party of our own - with our own smoked salmon - and not invite these two to show them how hurtful it is to do things like that without including everyone.
<p>But speaking about parties... Did you all get to go to that really amazing party that people (JAESUN AND LITTLE TÓMAS) threw after the pick-up Quidditch game? If you didn't, why not, where were you? Please owl me the answers to those questions. You can tell all the owls to take that letter to the O-Muffcakes because that's how they all know me as. Em, back to the party... It was fun! Everyone should have been there. People were sang at, people were there, <i>breathing</i> - it was perfect! Haha, maybe there will be another party to go to in the near future! If anybody wants to take up this job, please make sure to remember to bring little square cheeses, a lot of water, and maybe walking tubs of ice cream because those are cool.
<p>Okay my friends, that is all the juicy news I found for you! I hope you enjoy it, didn't choke on anything while you read it, and won't have nightmares about any of this stuff! This is the Fiesta Orange Muffin saying I love all of you a bunch! Goodbye! ♥