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Nora Breen
 Posted: Mar 6 2017, 10:34 AM
Quote
"and a heart that's made of glass, but mine's cracked!"
Jinx
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89 Posts
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Hogwarts Staff
Age
27
Height
Status
Year
Hospital Matron
House
Gryffindor Alumni
clash
AEGIS
Awards: None


"Goddammit, Nora Breen. Lumos."

The end of the woman's wand glowed, and its soft, yellow light crept into even the darkest places of the tiny broom closet she resided in. With the back of her free hand, she wiped away at the stupid tears on her face, not caring that there'd undoubtedly be a long streak of black across her eyes as a result. It didn't matter anyway; the tears had already ruined her hour of work in front of the mirror, causing her mascara to run like the wind and her foundation to be more uneven than Mount Blanc.

Then, she had been the pristine Matron Breen with attitude as sharp as her outfit and perfectly manicured nails. Now, she was just simply Nora, the woman who could barely function even though years had passed since the death of her husband.

"You told yourself this wasn't going to happen again," she chided, her voice low and hushed so as not to draw any attention from outside passerby. "Two years! It's been two years, and you're still acting like a child. Eirian would make fun of you." An image of her husband, against some vague landscape in a hazy memory, flashed in her mind. "Eirian wouldn't want this." Her voice shook. "Eirian..." The former Gryffindor struggled to hold onto the last of her pride until she realized, Why? She was already hiding in this stupid broom closet, sitting in a fetal position between someone's long forgotten mop and a broken broomstick covered in several centuries worth of dust.

There was no fucking point.

A soft, painful sob escaped her chest, and it stepped on everything from her stomach to her heart on the way up. It was only the first of many. Only for a few minutes, she thought, burying her face into her arms as the waterworks started.

"That's okay, right?" she whispered to no one in particular.

-----

@Jacian Turner Sorry if it seems short! But... it just felt right. Like there was nothing left to say. x3

--------------------
A head like steel and a soul of gold
• And a heart that's made of glass


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Jacian Turner
 Posted: Mar 6 2017, 03:55 PM
Quote
"Can't we give ourselves one more chance?"
Nadya
Offline
She/Her
90 Posts
Rep: 4 pts
[ + | - ]
Group
Hogwarts Staff Beginner
Age
27
Height
5'8"
Status
Pureblood
Year
Counselor
House
Gryffindor Alumni
clash
n/a
Awards: 18



It was while Jacian was passing by a door that he heard a noise; it was one of those random doors that lead to some manner of storage room the likes of which peppered the halls around Hogwarts but were so rarely opened that they had the habit of fading from focus as one walked by - blending into the stone walls of oft used hallways. A stuttered step brought him to a halt and he listened, subconsciously holding his breath to better hear the sound. He was really hoping he hadn't stumbled upon some rebellious students' secret liaison - he remembered stories of his fellow students sneaking away years ago, though honestly he could think of a rather vast list of places for such that would be better than an old broom closet with who knew how many years worth of dust layered on everything. Not that he had made use of such a list back then, but that was besides the point - and hormone-driven teenagers weren't always thinking with their brains anyway - neither were some adults for that matter.

It only took a moment's pause in the otherwise vacant hall to hear another faint sound and any humor lining his thoughts was banished in an instant. The noise was muffled but discernible as he stood close to the door; it was the sound of a sob and not just the sad whimper and sniffling of someone crying over something upsetting but a heart-wrenching sound of a lost soul, devastation made audible. He was no empath, however the day to day nature of his job had given him more insight into the nuances of tone that was carried by one's voice, none of that was needed to read this however. Before he could process what he was doing, his hand took hold of the handle and pulled the door open slowly and only enough to peek inside. When his mind finally caught up he realized maybe he should try to talk to whoever was behind the door before simply stepping into the makeshift retreat where they'd hidden away for whatever reason that had them so anguished.

Though it was by then too late and his eyes were already adjusting to what was actually more light than he had expected to see, due to the familiar charm filling the room with its glowing aura centered on the tip of a wand. It was the hunched figure holding that wand that caught him by surprise, even curled in on herself and her face hidden by her arms. He could still identify the woman that had been like a sister, unlike the one that he had once had and unlike the similar relationship he had with Saffron, but more like if he'd had a sibling his own age to run about causing trouble and fleeing before they got caught. And they'd caused their share of troubles and helped each other too. Then she and Eirian had helped him when no one else was there - they were the only two who he dared to trust actually believed him when he said he didn't do what had been accused of him - even if it hadn't mattered in the end, they'd tried to help and that had been more than most.

"Nora?" Jace whispered, hesitantly though the concern was obvious, as he stepped in, closing the door behind him - he didn't think his friend wanted anyone passing by to catch her like this or else she wouldn't have been huddled in a broom closet. He'd seen her that once, the first dinner his first official day as Hogwarts staff, which he felt would have been in poor form to skip - but that day had been such a whirlwind he hadn't gotten to seek her out then. It was odd seeing her there, certainly, however he of all people knew life didn't always take the path you were expecting. But then the school year began and he fell into that routine, while it was in the back of his mind that he should find her so they could catch up, he had kept pushing it forward for whatever reason and now he felt a rush of guilt that he had done so - what could possibly have her in this state? Was it something recent or had he failed one of his closest friends when he'd hidden himself away?
--
@Nora Breen

--------------------
      
Fluff by Bolt! ❤
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Nora Breen
 Posted: Mar 8 2017, 04:39 PM
Quote
"and a heart that's made of glass, but mine's cracked!"
Jinx
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89 Posts
Rep: 6 pts
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Hogwarts Staff
Age
27
Height
Status
Year
Hospital Matron
House
Gryffindor Alumni
clash
AEGIS
Awards: None


Nora didn’t know how long she had been sitting there when Jacian had finally discovered her in the midst of a pathetic breakdown. The moon could have dropped beneath the horizon and marched back across the sky a thousand times over and she might’ve never known. Because, even though she had promised herself only a few moments and even tried to count the seconds that passed (Get up when you reach 300.), those seconds had blurred into minutes, and possibly those minutes into hours. Again, she didn’t know. It was the least of her problems now, having just been caught in one of the school’s obscure broom closets with a tear-streaked face and halfway through another sob. Oh, God, she had meant to say. Her mouth had even opened, ready to defuse the situation by delivering some sort of self-deprecating comment, but now her throat was dry and all she could manage was a hiccup. Shaking her head, Nora struggled to recollect the composure she’d carelessly scattered to the corners of her tiny space. Clearing her throat, she tried again, this time by starting with a stern expression that hopefully was somewhat reminiscent of the tough girl she’d been back in her school days. Nodding firmly, she finally acknowledged him aloud: “Jacian.”

In the silence that followed, Nora frantically grasped at an explanation – something that wasn’t so obviously a lie, but something not quite the truth either. But still distressed and numb, her mind failed her. So instead, in the most serious, steady voice one could muster after a long session of crying, she said, “It’s nice to see you.” The Matron’s dark, umber gaze never wavered from his face, hoping that her steadiness might add authenticity to her words. She didn’t want him to worry after all. Although, when she thought more about it, Jacian didn’t even know that Eirian had died. At the thought, a frown settled across Nora’s lips. That was... unfair of her actually. Jacian had been Eirian’s close friend and he didn’t even know that he would never see the man again. She should say something; she should’ve said something sooner. The news would be several months late if delivered now.

And whose fault was that besides Nora’s? Even though she knew of his presence at the school, she had awkwardly avoided him with the hopes that his prying questions might not reopen wounds that weren’t even finished healing. But I guess I do that all on my own, she thought grimly, eyes searching the counselor’s face for nothing in particular.

It wasn’t that she didn’t still care for the Jace. How could she not when they had spent so many years together as children and teenagers. They used to be so full of energy, terrorizing the halls with their mischief and leaving behind echoes of their laughter as they fled from professor and caretaker alike. There was no mistaking it. Even though it had been a long time it was still him. He looked more tired than she remembered. Was that what adulthood did? Take the stars that God planted in your eyes as a child and snuff them out one by one, until you looked as defeated as Nora and disheveled as Jacian? Suddenly feeling tired herself, the woman dropped her gaze and simply buried her face back into her arms so that all she could see was darkness. “But yeah,” she finally continued, her feeble voice escaping into the hazy, dusted space between them, “don’t mind me. I’ll be out in a few minutes, so you can just... be on your way.”

-----

@Jacian Turner

--------------------
A head like steel and a soul of gold
• And a heart that's made of glass


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Jacian Turner
 Posted: Mar 9 2017, 04:37 AM
Quote
"Can't we give ourselves one more chance?"
Nadya
Offline
She/Her
90 Posts
Rep: 4 pts
[ + | - ]
Group
Hogwarts Staff Beginner
Age
27
Height
5'8"
Status
Pureblood
Year
Counselor
House
Gryffindor Alumni
clash
n/a
Awards: 18



Jace watched as his friend's expression shifted - once, twice? - all various degrees of frowning. He wasn't entirely sure if the mask she was struggling to set into place was as brittle as it seemed to him or if it was only because of the years of familiarity between them that it took little effort to see through it, for all that there were now years that had separated them as well. It twisted her words and left him wondering if all she had managed to say to him so far was as thin and forced as the last. Their immediate situation did its share to turn her saying she was glad to see him into absurdity to his ears. His eyes narrowed, his head slightly tilted, as the distance between them felt almost like a tangible wall and not the slight space of floating dust in the air flickering through the glow from her wand. Jace, however, chose to ignore said feeling and stepped further into the space until he stood in front of his friend and knelt down so their eyes were level, if she hadn't been hiding hers behind her arms. For a moment, he pressed his own eyes shut and took a deep breath in then out, sending the flickering motes around them swirling, as he opened his eyes again.

"That's bullshit an' ye know it," he finally spoke into the tense silence, for all the harshness of the words themselves they were spoke with an edge of pleading - his tone grasping for the trust that had apparently been lost in their time apart. He supposed it was deserved, for all that he had rewarded his friendships by running from them when his own life had fallen apart, instead of seeking them out as the nature of the relationships were supposed to invite. Sharing his troubles with others had never been a strong point for him, another irony given his new occupation. Though he'd been called worse than a hypocrite so it was something he'd have to live with. Shifting slightly forward as if willing Nora to meet his gaze, he continued, "how would ye expect me to just be on m'way and leave you like this? When would I've ever done that?"

He settled his weight back again where he knelt, giving space between them once more as if encouraging her to answer. Though his questions echoed in his head and his guilt began to shred them. Maybe he already had done so, but at the moment he didn't care if he didn't deserve what he was asking. "Let me help you - what's wrong?" It was painful seeing his friend like this, her spirit seemed shattered and he needed to know why, even if all he could do was listen, though he braced himself for any manner of reaction, he honestly wasn't certain what to expect.

---
@Nora Breen

--------------------
      
Fluff by Bolt! ❤
PMEmail
^
Nora Breen
 Posted: Aug 5 2017, 07:23 AM
Quote
"and a heart that's made of glass, but mine's cracked!"
Jinx
Offline
89 Posts
Rep: 6 pts
[ + | - ]
Group
Hogwarts Staff
Age
27
Height
Status
Year
Hospital Matron
House
Gryffindor Alumni
clash
AEGIS
Awards: None


Nora winced.

At one point in her life, Nora had been like the fire that Prometheus stolen away from the gods, burning brighter and hotter than most people anyone would ever meet in their life. But somewhere between Eirian's passing and now, the loneliness had wrapped around her like a cloak of winter that kept her at a distance from everyone she knew. As Jace's words of concern and care fell upon her ears, they sounded strange – unfamiliar and almost new. Like hot iron pressed upon her skin, they almost burned. Nora couldn't remember the last time she had let anyone care for her; maybe because she was convinced that no one would ever care for her again. But here he was: Jacian Turner. The boy she'd watched grow into a man, who had too many cares to give.

"Never." Her whisper tasted bitter with the knowledge of what was soon to come. Turning her head from her knees, Nora looked up at Jace, lacking the energy for any sort of expression, save for the exhaustion that shadowed the valleys of her face.

Always. Jace had always been there for her as a child, holding her back from getting her into fist fights that weren't worth it, cheering her on when she got into ones that were. He was there when she'd met the light of her life, poking fun at her while she adjusted to the strange prickling of love beneath her heart, and now he was here with her in the dark, kneeling in front of her in a cramped closet as she tried to disentangle the thorns of loneliness from her limbs. And he deserves more than what I've given him, she realized, the ache of another sob banging against the back of her throat, he deserves what I haven't given him.

And then again, she finally started to cry at his kindness – a kindness no one had the opportunity to give before because her tears always fell behind closed doors, in the rain, or at the dead of night. "I'm sorry, Jace, I should have told you sooner – owled you or something, I don't know – but..." She paused, swallowing the ball of needles that scratched at her throat. God, I'm probably so ugly, she thought, trying to wipe away at streaks of make up she couldn't see, unable to help the fact that she hated looking so pathetic. A silence passed between them, Nora spending it quietly sniffing musky air into her lungs.

One more time.

"Eirian... he's... he's gone. Been gone." How long? Nora tried to remember, but there wasn't really a point was there? A single night, a hundred months, it all felt like forever in the dark. "It was during one of our auror missions. One that I was on." She met him in the eye, scorning at her own weakness. "I could have saved him! I should have been more aware. More prepared!" She slammed her fist against the ground, convincing herself that it was only a fraction of the pan that her late husband had suffered on his last night. "But I... I don't know what the hell I was doing. What the hell I was thinking. And now because of my stupidity, I'm... I'm—" Nora choked on the word, refusing to admit it aloud.

It was stupid really.

Saying the word didn't make it any more true than it already was.

-----

@Jacian Turner

--------------------
A head like steel and a soul of gold
• And a heart that's made of glass


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