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 I'll be a miner for a heart of gold, JR <3
Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 7 2017, 01:46 PM
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"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
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6th
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Ravenclaw
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Erik had not been lying when he had said that he despised sports. Getting sweaty was something that reminded him of summers that always felt too warm, of waking up at night with sheets sticking to his body because one nightmare had chased the other, of running from people who were taller, stronger and faster than him. In a way, it also reminded him of drunken nights, because he always felt so overheated when drunk, willing to take his clothes off even more than usual - and especially when people were cheering on him to do it. Either way, there were two kinds of sports he actually enjoyed: swimming and horseback-riding. None of them got him overly sweaty, and both were somehow connecting him back to his Swedish roots, given he had learned swimming in front of the shores of Luleå, strong hands carefully holding him until he learned how to float and move through the water, much like the seals that lived around the islands close by and could be watched from the boat his grandfather owned.

Horseback-riding was a different story. He had been taught to sit on a horse from the moment he could walk, legs too short to even reach the stirrups in those rare cases they had even bothered to put him on a pony with a saddle. The boy had learned to ride without it, and it drove the grooms of Hogwarts insane to watch him doing it under their prying eyes, too occupied to think of potential painful scenarios. Erik himself never thought about falling from his horse - he did not think about the broken bones and the bruises, because if fear was sitting in his back, he knew he would fall down. Not that falling was ever considered bad in the Swede’s eyes, but for today’s plans, he would have to stay safely up in the saddle - which actually meant attaching one to the chosen horse’s back.

While most of his encounters with JR Zerner had been spontaneous and unplanned, this one was not. He was not going to run with the lion - but he would try and show him another kind of stress relief, one that included the scent of hay and leather, and the warm bodies of horses that looked even bigger beside Erik’s small and skinny frame. His pale fingers wrapped carefully around the reins as he lead the black mare he had chosen through the aisle between the boxes once he had saddled it, making sure all the straps were safe and secure just like he had been taught to do it. The horse had warm, brown eyes and neighed and hugged gently at him before nudging its nose against his shoulder. He reached out to pet the soft black hair before shoving the stable doors open, where a mild and sunny March day was expecting him.

Not climbing the horse yet, he guided it towards the nearest fence and wrapped the reins around it before seating himself on the upper timber, reaching out to pull his overly long hair into a loose ponytail - not half as messy as he usually did, as he succeeded if he only tried enough. He stretched his arms over his head for a moment before continuing to pet the horse, patiently waiting for his new friend to arrive for an impromptu riding lesson - although Erik was not sure if he was that much of a good teacher.

@JR Zerner
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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 8 2017, 06:30 PM
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"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Age
17
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7th
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Gryffindor
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Awards: 34



    JR was nervous.

    Of all of the activities that that lion could be doing that day, he was going to ride a horse. He still wasn't quite sure how Erik had talked him into it, but the young man had found himself agreeing to meet the eagle by the stables that afternoon. Admittedly, the Gryffindor had spent a lot of the morning trying to shove away the nervousness by running a lot of it. Now he was showered, dressed in jeans and a thick sweatshirt that had a muggle baseball team on the back of it. The truth was that much of the lion's clothing was charmed to stretch and fit him since his growth spurt. This was because after his father died, his mother only bought him what she had needed to. JR didn't have a whole lot of extra pocket money and the young man had grown used to charming his clothing. His father had been a muggle, so it wasn't until the young man was eighteen that any funds that Joe Zerner left him would help him. Good thing that was coming up this June.

    His glamour charms had been carefully reapplied when in the shower, of course. It wasn't that JR expected to be shirtless when horse-riding -What did one wear, anyways? - but the young man had aquired a small fear that Erik would find out about them and for whatever reason, not want to be his friend anymore. It wasn't that the lion thought that they were ugly - no, to him they were more like battle scars, a signal that he survived a part of his life that had been horrible. However, the Gryffindor had an inaite fear that when anyone, not just Erik, found out about the scars beneath the charms, they would be full of pity and treat him differently. Treat him like he was fragile, different, than the people around him. This had been slightly confirmed when Kiska had been shocked, stunned to silence around him when he had shown her. Of course, when they had met at the pool and he had exposed them to her, she had not mentioned it at all or treated him much different at all, but JR felt that she had been very careful about it all. He didn't want people to have to be careful around him.

    His eyes wandered as his hands pushed into the sweatshirt pockets, nearly to the stables. Erik had been grinning as he asked him about the horse-riding, had teasingly told him that there was no way that the eagle would be found running with the lion, but that the younger student would be willing to teach him something new, if he didn't know how to ride a horse. Which the lion didn't, he hadn't even ever seen a horse up close, other than maybe a field trip as a small boy to a farm, or on Hogwarts grounds in passing. JR had never been on top of the majestic animal, hadn't ever really had the thought to even try. Yet, the Ravenclaw that had dug his way into JR's heart had gotten the lion to not only consider it, but to try it. Much like joining the Quidditch team, Erik had offered up his support in a subtle way that had made the young man comfortable with agreeing. How was it that the younger boy had been able to influence his decisions lately? It wasn't that JR felt manipulated in any way, though. On the contrary, the lion felt supported for the first time in quite a while.

    The stables came into view and JR felt a smile creep up on him as he saw Erik in the fenced area with a huge horse that made the eagle seem like a third year. He came to the side of the fence, smiling as he called out, "Hey! Who gave you a shrinking potion?" Even though he was nervous about being able to ride a horse, if his tiny friend could, maybe it wouldn't be so hard after all.
@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 9 2017, 12:26 PM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
16
Height
5'7
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Pureblood
Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



Over the years, Erik only had tried to teach a few people in how to ride a horse. He preferred to just right, climb a horse’s bare neck and ride until his hair was messy and his cheeks felt cold, back stiff and aching and muscles screaming for a massage or a very warm bath. For the Swede, the easiest way to feel success was pain - sometimes self-inflicted and sometimes caused by others instead, and during the past months, he had even abused the fine sport his grandparents had taught him for dangerous trips over the lawns of Hogwarts, risking to break every bone possible only to feel the rush of adrenaline, the thrill - death so close and yet so far away, the payment for the ferryman always in his pockets. Erik was living his life on the edge, and he always threatened to fall down - but that was fine, because there seemed to be so many people willing to catch him.

JR was definitely one of these people, although the boy had not quite figured out why that was. But he liked it - he liked feeling protected and kind of adored, in the most platonic way possible. Being with JR felt more and more like being with the brother he never had, and even more familiar than being with Kiljan who only ever had harsh words and accusations for him. Of course, Erik knew he deserved that treatment - but that did not mean he actually enjoyed it. His face brightened just a little as he saw the older boy approaching, reaching out to wave at him without stirring the horse beside him. The mare shook her head a little and neighed quietly, obviously used to riders who were much louder and much more nervous than the long-haired boy who had enough riding experience for the two of them.

To be entirely honest, he was not even dressed properly for horseback-riding. He wore no helmet, no riding boots, no pants that looked like the ones people usually wore when walking in and out of the stables. But it did not matter so much - it wasn’t like JR could lecture him on safety measures for riding (or at least that was what Erik hoped, who knew if the lion had not found a book of 101 Ways to Die on a Horse - that would be really unfortunate). “Shrinking potion? Rude, JR,” he gave back with a grin, clicking his tongue at the mare and guiding her closer. “That’s why they taught me to ride a horse - so I can look down on everyone, you know,” Erik added and pushed himself off with one leg, the other hugged in the stirrup.

With unusual grace, he swung himself on top of the horse, wrinkling his nose a little at the unfamiliar feeling of a saddle between his legs. But the expression faded again rather fast as he slowly pressed his thighs against the sides of the horse, making the mare walk closer to the fence and stopping right beside JR. “See. Much better. Finally eye to eye,” the eagle joked, although he was now finally taller than JR, looking down at his new friend and resisting the urge to ruffle the boy’s hair just because he could. He let the reins a little more loose, but still the horse stayed where it was, which made him smile in quiet triumph. Erik’s kitten might hate him with burning passion, but horses still obeyed him. “Are you ready to try yourself?” he then asked, quirking a brow at JR while his hands rested loosely on his thighs, keeping balance with ease.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 10 2017, 05:20 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
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Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



    There were not many people at Hogwarts or otherwise, that JR repeatedly had interactions with that were not filed with some kind of strings attached. With Erik, it was like the two had this unspoken agreement to not delve too deep into things, but at the same time, not withholding from it each other, either. It was a combination that only seemed to work for the two of them - anyone else would be demanding more of JR, he'd feel uncomfortable, and end the relationship before it even had even had time to begin. It gave JR this incling of hope that maybe a friendship could really work between them. Of course, he already considered the eagle his friend, but he had no real way of knowing how Erik felt about him.

    Then again, it had been the younger boy's idea to come out here. It would be easy to conclude that the eagle felt close enough to the lion to want to teach him something new, to want to spend time with him that was actually coordinated and planned rather than happenstance. JR laughed softly as Erik called him rude. Just like that, the tension eased away from the Gryffindors shoulders and he was thrown back into this confident feeling that Erik did like him, did consider him his friend, and did want to be around him. JR wasn't exactly sure what he had done to earn the eagle to actually like him since the reality was that the young man only seemed to come into the smaller boy's life and shake it up a little bit. However, JR was not going to complain, because this felt like the budding of something that he wanted to last a very long time. Whatever the younger boys' reasons, JR wasn't going to question them. Or at least, he wasn't going to question it right that moment when Erik was suddenly taller than him.

    Looking up - what a strange feeling to be looking up at him - JR watched Erik's expressions. "You seem pretty comfortable," he responded, not sure if he was quite ready or not. "Have you been riding long?" Maybe some questions would stall the time and in that time, the young man would be able to swallow the nervousness that was still toying with him. It messed with the feelings of having fun with Erik and JR wrinkled his nose slightly. It made him want to run, both figuratively and literally. But what was it that Erik had said this was? Something much more relaxing that would still take his mind away from things? JR's expression fell away and he nodded, more to himself than at the eagle. He trusted Erik, and with the words replaying in his mind, the lion had the thought that maybe the younger boy understood him more than they had really talked about. JR was willing to try the stress relief that his new friend used. "Sure, how do I get in there?" He gestured around the fenced area, not quite sure how to get to where Erik and the horse were.
@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 13 2017, 05:37 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
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Height
5'7
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Pureblood
Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



Erik was not a good teacher - and it mainly rooted from being the one to be taught more than the one who was teaching others. He never tutored anyone, because his grades were nothing to boast with, and Herbology seemed to be one of these subjects no one really needed tutoring for. He had never shown someone how to ride a horse, as those people who surrounded him often already knew how to do it. And those things he could teach people were nothing one spoke of in public, things that were performed behind closed doors and rewarded with fingers in his hair, either petting the soft strands of pale blonde or pulling gently on them. This whole situation was new - yet many situations with JR Zerner were new. No one had tried to save him several times before, and no one was so selfless around Erik. JR Zerner seemed to be the human equivalent to a Kinder surprise egg - one never knew what to expect, yet it was always a pleasant surprise wrapped in chocolate.

"At least you put a shirt one, wise decision. Bare-chested horseback-riding isn't for amateurs, you know," Erik teased him, smirking at the mental image of JR riding over the lawns of Hogwarts, on a white mare with his short hair blowing in the wind and his chest bare, sweat glistening in the spring sunlight. For someone who was not much into muscle-packed men, Erik's fantasy became rather flowery when he started thinking about it in detail. The Swede laughed a little at the lion's words, shrugging carelessly. "I've been riding ever sicne I could walk - not professionally, of course. My grandma did that for a while before she married my grandfather. Show jumping and all that shits." It was not too much of a personal information to give away - a mere fact about his life, something that didn't matter much yet explained why he was so comfortable on top of a creature that was way taller than he was himself.

It was almost cute how JR was for once in a more helpless position than Erik himself, and the younger boy tilted his head at his friend before pressing his thighs against the horse's side, guiding it towards the gate and kicking one foot against it. It opened, the wooden fence swinging open and offering entry to the fenced area where horses could be left from their reins to run a little. Right now, it was only Erik and the mere, waiting for JR to enter while he held onto the saddle, swinging his leg - and his whole body - from the horse's back again to stand beside her, holding the reins and petting the mare's neck carefully. His green gaze stayed settled on the taller boy, waiting for him to walk in and approach, as the first lesson of riding a horse was always to climb on its back - unless one had a grandfather who lived small bodies on a pony's back without a single care.

Once JR was by his side, Erik adjusted his own position again, his boots digging in the dust and sending small clouds flying through the air as he put one hand onto the saddle again. "Okay, so first thing you gotta learn is to get on the horse, of course. It's not that hard - especially 'cause you're taller than me. You reach for the pommel, put your left foot on the stirrup and swing your right let - and the rest of your body - over the horse's back. Like this," the eagle said, displaying what he had just explained, only to repeat the motion of climbing off the horse once more. The mare stayed unimpressed, merely blinking and shaking her head just a little.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 13 2017, 07:53 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



    It was a running joke between the two boys Erik seemed to find highly amusing. JR seemed to be always be just finishing up from a run when the two boys met and therefore, the lion had nearly always been caught shirtless by the smaller boy. At one point the young man thought that this had bothered the eagle, his thoughts drifting back to the moments in the kitchen the two boys had shared - but Erik had made those thoughts vanished as he firmly stated that he was not like his boyfriend, Quincy Elkins. It was funny, not a haha sort of funny, but an ironic sort of funny, how it was turning out that the younger boy was such a middle man between the two Gryffindors. JR had not spoken to Quincy since the night he had interrupted the couple in the Gryffindor common room, but from what Erik had hinted at in the kitchens, and then again in the corridors as they traveled a few days later, the couple was doing well and were much more honest with each other than they had been before.

    "At least I can do something right." he smiled fondly at the smaller boy that was not so small upon the magnificent creature he was on top of. Not wearing a shirt during this activity hadn't even crossed the seventh year's mind until Erik brought it up, but now that he mentioned it, it was sort of funny, this time in the comical way.

    It was like an unspoken promise between the two boys to not ask questions when one gave information about their families; to simply store the information that the other had revealed somewhere in the back of their minds, to know the other better but yet not question of ask for more details. This is what the lion did as he gazed up at Erik, watching him with green eyes as he walked along the fence that was between them. Soon, JR was on the right side of the fence and a renewed bundle of nerves had been placed his his stomach like a scurry of ants over a piece of dropped bread. His hands slipped into his pockets as he watched the younger boy dismount the horse - not that he knew such terminology to getting off the animal. He couldn't ever remember being so close to a horse - the only thing that came to mind, in truth, was the thestral that he had seen in the Forbidden Forest a few weeks prior with a different Ravenclaw. That creature had seemed to like him and JR could only hope that the animal he was about to try and ride would like him even more.

    His hand joined Erik's the mare's neck, running his fingers along the sleek coat of his magnificent body. Was he really going to try and ride this this? It would probably hate him and throw him off within the first few minutes, wouldn't it? Who was he trying to kid, thinking that he could be some kind of pro, riding a horse. But it was the nerves that were speaking now, and the lion was determined not to let them win. After all, how could he be called a Gryffindor if he let such a silly little fear rule him? JR bit the inside corner of his cheek, listening to Erik's words carefully as his finger idly stroked the horse, secretly hoping that he was at least doing that right.

    The eagle's words didn't quite make sense - his words were filled with vocabulary that might as well have been foreign to the the lion, so JR was grateful that his friend had followed the words with an example. His gaze never wavered, the determined expression still etched into the features of his face, his brows furrowed slightly as his eyes moved to where Erik put his feet and darted to where his hand's went. All too soon the younger boy was again up on the horse and JR was left looking up at him in wonderment. He made it look so easy, so why exactly did his stomach tell him that it was going to be a lot harder than it looked? JR nodded to his friend and replied, "Alright. Let me try, I think I can do this. You better not laugh if I get kicked off."
@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 15 2017, 05:35 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
16
Height
5'7
Status
Pureblood
Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



Erik really did not have a problem with nudity, as he had grown up in Sweden - sauna visits with the whole family had been a thing after all, and even afterwards he had found himself in various states of nudity one night or another. It was fun to tease the older boy with it, as there was no real meaning behind it - no secret longing, no yearning to be with JR in those ways, and it was good to have a friend he had not slept with yet (and was not planning on doing so, anyway). “Yes, you’re off to a good start,” the smaller boy just added with a smirk, although it really wouldn’t surprise him if the shirt came off sooner or later. It almost belonged to their meetings by now, small rituals like the teasing and the random pieces of information that were offered. And with every time they met, Erik felt a little more comfortable around the lion.

The eagle stretched a little, all that mounting and dismounting the horse stretching his muscles in rather unusual ways, given he had spent large amounts of the past months lying around without moving more than he really had to. Withdrawal processes came with a certain apathy and laziness, and he had not trusted himself with going for a swim or ride without finding another way to get hurt. Today, he was positive - because even when JR was not capable of riding a horse just yet, he wouldn’t allow Erik to get hurt. He was like a walking safety net - the kind of rubber wall that was used with crash test dummies, a soft pillow to fall on when jumping. It felt weird to trust someone like this - yet it also felt just right to do it.

“I don’t think she’ll kick you off,” the Swede grinned and took a hold onto the reins, petting the mare’s nose affectionately while he watched JR carefully. “The worst thing that can happen is that you’ll just fall off again from the other side because you’re having too much uhh...spunk?” Some words would always stay weird, even if he had learned to speak both Swedish and English. Those unintentional slips from one language to another Severin displayed on a less controlled day never happened to Erik himself, yet he was prone to throw in words that did not belong in a sentence when he was drunk - a state everyone wanted him to avoid. It was rare enough he could speak Swedish to anyone, including Severin, his cousin Kiljan and his ex-boyfriend who had gotten occasional rants in a wild mixture of both Swedish and Norwegian.

Everything Erik did, he did with a certain slur - to fence, ride, swim, dance, and even speak. He was sticking to the rules - or at least in the frame of a certain set of rules - yet he lacked the sharp edges, the strict movements, the details of everything because he was slurring them away, moving and speaking after his own rhythm with little care of the world around him. It had driven his professors and parents insane, yet he never stopped - to be truly himself had always been a goal, even though he had to admit he had tried to be someone else for far too long. Being with JR helped to stay true to himself, to do what he enjoyed and to admit these things. There was no shame in preferring books over someone else’s company, or to genuinely love horseback-riding. He didn’t do any of these things to please someone else - he just wanted to be happy. And unfortunately, happiness was a state that was harder to reach than he had initially thought.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 15 2017, 05:22 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



Language at the end, just to be fair and safe and all that jazz.
    Happiness wasn't something that JR was used to. Of course, his childhood had been filled with happy memories of playing baseball with his father, of trips to the restaurant that the older man had owned. JR was the spitting image of his father, Joe Zerner and it had been clear to all that knew them that they were each other's best friend, even as one was the father and the other the son. Locked away somewhere were times of laughter, times of cooking pies late into the night, spending non-school days at the restaurant that his father was owner of. Junior's Home had been just that, the boys' home. But the happy memories of the days with his father were locked away deep in the trunk that also hid away the young man's more recent, hardly happy ones that were with his mother. The ones with his mother caused the insomnia at night and before the lion had figured out that running slammed the lid of the trunk that held emotions, JR had experienced the edge of panic attacks. Running took away the bad things and in return, left the good things also locked away tight.

    In the last month, between Erik and Kiss, emotions were threatening to spill out. In a good way - the two people had sort of become a safe haven in his life. They were his rocks, the people that would listen to him without really questioning further what was going on in his head. Kiss had stuck with him even after seeing the scars ridged into his torso and back; he could only hope that if the eagle ever noticed them, the younger boy would do the same. However, within the happy moments that he had felt with Erik and Kiss there had also been ugly, overwhelming moments that had been threatening to be released when the trunk of emotions was opened. Aki Sei wanted so much to help him; which in itself was not bad but how could he ask for help when he didn't know the first thing about helping himself? The fights with Erik's boyfriend, Quincy, had stuck with the young man, leaving a bitter taste in his mouth. Jealousy had popped yet again when he had found Kiss talking to Martín Marzán. It all made it very clear to the lion that he was not running often enough or long enough any longer; he was struggling to focus on staying above the treacherous waters.

    But now, looking at the boy that was with him, he smiled. JR might be nervous because he was about to attempt riding this large animal next to the boys, but at the same time, he felt like Erik was this butterfly that just had to be chased after. It had started the first night he had found the eagle in the corridor and continued now - where he just wanted the best for the younger blonde. JR noticed the odd placement of the words Erik used, yet he showed no sign that he had. That was their thing. Commenting on such things would lead into what nationality the eagle was, which was personal information. Shifting, the lion followed the movements that Erik had shown him to get up into the saddle and within a few moments, was sitting triumphantly above the broad horse.

    His grin that was shot in the direction of his friend was short lived, however. Even though the mare had sat still for Erik, JR must've done something to cue the animal to start running; fast. His heart beat was suddenly in his ears as his fingers tried to find the strap that Erik had been holding on to and his face was surely the color of a ghost as his teeth bit into his bottom lip, his eyes flashing around the fenced area as the horse ran. As quickly as the horse had started, he stopped. Too soon the young man felt relief as he was suddenly tumbling off the magnificent creature towards the earth.

    So much for not falling off, right?

    His right shoulder hit first and the young man heard the crunching in his wand arm of the bone being hurt. Or at least that's what he assumed, as he was no medical expert. His breath came faster, adrenaline raining through his body from the unexpectedness of the fast paced lesson. It was then that JR felt it. The dam of emotions, the trunk that he had so carefully been slamming closed by being careful and literally running from the things within all came tumbling out. Why was it him? Why was it that he had to deal with all of this? Why had it been his mother that was the beast instead of anyone elses? And why, Merlin why, was he riding a horse and trying to be happy instead of running the way that he should have been?

    "Fuck," he groaned, shifting to sit up, his face showing that this time, there was no run left in him; the adrenaline that was flowing through his body was not reserved for flight this time; it was pure fight and the anger was present in the lion's eyes, face and stiff body motions. JR had been hiding the emotions away for ages, but it seemed now that he snapped like a twig. "What the hell was that?" he shot angrily at the horse, as it watched him calmly, neighing softly. It was as if all of JR's problems could be cast onto the creature. "All I wanted to do was ride you. What the fuck did I do that made you run off on me?"
@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 18 2017, 08:04 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
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3964 Posts
Rep: 42 pts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
16
Height
5'7
Status
Pureblood
Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



Erik had only realised how weird his life had become when he had started to miss those normal things: hours spent in bed with a book, sitting by the jetties of the Black Lake and throwing pebbles into the water, and going to the stables to ride a horse without a care. JR made all these things just a little more desirable again - the moments of tranquility when Erik did not have to pretend he was in complete control of his life while he really wasn’t, when he could just be sixteen years old, no matter which mistakes and flaws came with it. It as relaxing and breaking through the strange routines Erik had developed for himself, circles of keeping himself busy enough with napping or attaching himself to someone else’s side only to stop the thought of really needing a drink from running through his mind all the time.

So there he was, standing in the corral and stretching his arms above his head until he could hear a satisfying plop coming from his shoulders. It was a good day so far - the weather was mild enough and his was going to teach his new friend how to ride. What was the worst that could happen, right? Obviously, fate was watching them carefully, raising the right threads to make the stumble again as soon as things were going rather smooth. Erik watched when JR climbed the horse, impressed how the lion managed it on the first attempt - but then shit went down. With a muttered curse in his mother tongue, the small eagle jogged after the running horse, yet he was not fast enough to stop the inevitable from happening.

A mere few moments after the mare’s little outbreak, she paused again and threw JR off. There was a very uncomfortable, disgusting sound, and Erik sped up, running towards the older boy and dropping to his knees beside him. At least JR was conscious, but whatever bone had made that sound most likely was not quite as okay as it should be. “Are you okay?” he asked quietly - a question that almost answered himself while his fingers dug into the sand-like material that covered the grounds, watching the other boy carefully. There was a curse - and then something seemed to change, like clouds veiling the sun all of the sudden. JR always seemed to be a steady rock in a rough sea - but now, he seemed to be faltering as the water’s impact became too much to bear.

Erik winced - just for a second - before smoothly getting to his feet, reaching for the reins of the horse and petting the mare’s neck carefully before his gaze wandered back to JR, a frown on his forehead. “Yelling at her won’t exactly make her like you, horses are sensitive,” he stated quietly, although it sounded more like he was talking about himself being too sensitive for a reaction like that - but did he really have any right to do so? He simply kept watching JR, waiting for some reaction, no matter if it would be better or worse while the hand that was not holding onto the reins was brushing dirt from the back of his pants.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 19 2017, 02:18 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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627 Posts
Rep: 11 pts
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
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Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



    The onlly thing that JR Zerner felt was pain. Pain was in his shoulder and spreading down his arm, pain in his leg, though that was less. There was pins and needles all throughout the lion's body that wasn't physical, but an emotional stabbing of sorts. It had been a long time since the young man had felt this way and it was not something he welcomed into his mind and body. His lips opened, a shuddery, gasping sound coming from them. Erik was right; it was not the horses fault that he was feeling this way. It had been his fate to have a nasty mother and the horse that he had tried to get on had nothing to do with it. In fact, realistically, the lion knew that he had probably done something to deserve the throw off - whether he had hurt the horse or simply had nudged it the wrong way, the young man wasn't sure.

    As he sat there with his ass in the dirt of the fenced area - JR didn't know if it was considered a pasture or not - the lion pulled his knees up to his chest, rocking slightly back and forth. The pain was all too much to bear for the Gryffindor and it reminded him of the darkness - the damp and dark wetness of the basement where he had stayed for three summers. His breath was more raspy now, as he watched Erik calm the mare knowing the back of his head that the eagle was right. But the pain. Merlin. It hurt so much. JR knew that he was on the edge, the edge of an attack and there wasn't uh he could do about it at the moment because he was forced to sit there, the physical pain preventing him from getting up and running away the way that he normally would. Memories of the darkness swirled in his mind and the face of the Gryffindor had a shadow, his normally bright green eyes were sunk. His back and chest ached suddenly where there were scars and it was all too much for the haunted young man.

    He let out a loud shriek, his head tilted back, his eyes focusing on nothing in the present time as he was staring up at the sky. Erik's words faded away, the soft sounds of the mare faded, the scent of the early spring as well as the sounds - they all faded away as the trunk of emotions and memories that JR had worked so hard at locking away opened up. His mind was racing, replaying the memories that he had carefully stored away in the back of his mind. His heart beat was faster, his fingers clenched even though that hurt as well. He could almost feel the pain of the boy in the memories as they were happening all over again, feel the etchings of the curses and the whip that had made the lashes in his skin under the glamour charms.

    And then it was over. JR's head fell onto his knees, a shuddering sound coming from his lips before they pressed together and he moaned softly, his eyes closing. The attack was the worse he had suffered in a long time and he was suddenly exhausted the adrenaline leaving the lion as quickly as it had come. His eyes burned with tears even if he knew that he would not shed a single one. His whole body shuddered as his left arm - the unbroken one hugged his legs for a long moment, trying so hard to steady himself before he had to face his friend once more.

    Erik. Oh Merlin. His new friend was either going to have tons of questions now or just turn and leave him, thinking that he had been wrong about the Gryffindor, that the lion was actually a nutcase and he wouldn't be wrong. His heart sank and he was surprised with how much it hurt - it was like he was going to loose Kiss and Liam all over again. This was why he didn't get close to anyone, that was for sure. With a heaving sigh, the lion slowly raised his head, his back straightening so that he was still holding his knees but his eyes met the gaze of the eagle. "I'm sorry," he whispered, defeated, broken, emotions clearly swirling within his words as they came out.

    It had taken three years and two separate times of becoming completely vulnerable, but JR finally had broken.
@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 23 2017, 02:09 PM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
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Height
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6th
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Ravenclaw
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neutral
Awards: 65



The scent of horses and the slowly awakening nature around them had something calming about it while Erik simply kept petting the mighty creature beside him, his dull, green gaze settled on the older boy with a mixture of hesitation and confusion, because he did not know what to do. His fingers twitched around the reins, because all of the sudden, he felt helpless again - almost like watching someone drown at the sea without a chance to step in and save said person. He bit his lip until he could taste blood, desperately trying to cling to any solution that passed his mind. The combination of runes that soothed pain was not an unfamiliar one, as well as a simple healing charm that would make the pain bearable until JR could reach the hospital wing - but it seemed like the pain the boy was feeling was more than just the one from falling off the mare’s back.

There was a shriek that made Erik wince, confirming his thoughts that the fall had triggered something else - an attack of one kind or another. It was not something that repelled Erik, as the boy had suffering from it not too long ago, after the last visit at his father’s home - when all the feelings he usually experienced (too much, too many without the muting filter of alcohol) had been gone for several hours until Avalon had managed to crack him again, causing him to laugh and then to cry immediately afterwards. Slowly, the boy moved and tied the mare’s reins onto the fence, muttering a few calming words towards the majestic creature before petting her nose and moving closer towards JR. He was not afraid of the boy’s reaction, as he did not look like he would hurt him. In fact, he looked like he had been hurt badly a long, long time ago and now was not capable to hurt anyone else, ever.

Shoving his hands in the pockets of his jacket, he slowly walked around the lion and crouched down beside him again, before he simply let himself drop to his knees, hesitantly reaching out and placing a hand on JR’s shoulder - as light as a butterfly wing’s beating, without any pressure or force while his green eyes filled with worry. “Hey, no need to be sorry. You didn’t do anything wrong. Are you...are you okay? I can...if you let me, I think I can soothe the pain until you let the matron check on it?” he offered softly, almost expecting a scolding in return. The mare just watched the two of them, before her nose was lowered and dug into the sand-like ground, looking for grass or anything else that was edible.

He could feel the rough grounds through the rips in his jeans, but for the moment, Erik did not care about such minor details. His whole attention was settled on JR who looked like a fallen Tower in a game of chess - broken and defeated for the moment and lacking his usual superiority. It was strange how their roles had changed for the moment, how Erik was now trying to comfort and protect him while he did not even know what had caused such a reaction. “I...I know we don’t do this but….what happened?” he asked quietly, silently begging for a reply without pushing too much. His only reaction was that he wanted to wrap his arms tightly around the older boy, yet he could not tell whether this would make the situation better or worse, leaving his hand on JR’s shoulder instead.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 23 2017, 08:14 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



Green eyes had water in them, extra water in them, as they watched Erik lead the mare away. This was the defining moment were the lion became alone, where his sorry was no longer necessary because the eagle was choosing to walk away. A heavy sigh escaped his lips as he watched Erik talk softly to the mare fully expecting that the younger boy was just going to leave JR in the dust and dirt. But people seemed to like to prove the lion wrong; he watched as his friend tied the horse's reins to the fence and then come back to him, slowly, cautiously and his heart sank all over again - he had caused this. Caused Erik to be cautious and not really want to approach him. His head lowered to his knees, shame twisting in his gut as he listened to Erik's boots on the earth.

His body shook as Erik's fingers pressed lightly into his shoulder and he nodded ever so slightly, grateful to the boy that hadn't turned away, hadn't run. If it had been JR would he have run from the eagle? The answer was a resounding no but at the same time, the lion held different expectations for the people in the world around him; for if people knew the horrors that he had seen or experienced, they would feel pity and sorrow for him. When those things came, so did the different actions of those said people. It was a dirty and hopeless cycle that JR had seen time and time again when he was younger, with people that came in to his father's restaurant with problems.

A soft sigh escaped his lips and he lifted his head once more. Erik deserved more than this. He was being kind; he was here, resting in the dirt next to JR even after the lion had spent the last ten minutes upsetting the horse that the eagle had been trying to share with him, yelling, and battling inner demons. "That would be great," he choked out, his voice barely above a whisper. "The pain.... It hurts." He didn't know if he meant the physical throbbing of his shoulder or the emotional pain that he was inflicted with, but they both hurt and they hurt a lot.

This was the defining point in the two boys' relationship. Erik still wasn't pushing him and JR knew that if he chose not to answer, the younger boy wouldn't ask again. Yet, this time, this time was different. He knew that he owed at least a small explanation for the yelling that he done at Erik's horse, not to mention the probably confusing actions afterwords. Licking his lips, his green eyes met those of his friend. "I've seen horrible things, Erik," he replied, his voice still soft. "I've endured terrible things." He paused. Dare he go on to tell the eagle more, or would that make the smaller boy fade away from his side? JR licked his lips and sighed, "The last friends I had... I hurt them. I pushed them away so that they wouldn't find out that my life fell apart."Maybe his words held a warning, too. The lion wasn't sure as some part of him held his breath for Erik's reactions.

@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 24 2017, 01:24 PM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
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Height
5'7
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Year
6th
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Ravenclaw
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neutral
Awards: 65



Boys like JR were not supposed to cry. They were supposed to carry pretty girls in bridal style, to catch people when they slipped on banana peels and to rescue kittens from trees they had climbed in youthful naiveté. They sure as hell were not supposed to look at him with a strange mixture of pain and surprise, as if JR had expected him to leave. Erik was not sure if it really spoke for him that the older boy somehow expected him to walk away from a troublesome situation rather than facing it. It was true that Erik did not like confrontation, but mostly because he lacked the patience and strength to defend himself. His protective senses - as well hidden as they might be - were tingling when he looked at the mess of big boy on the floor, all thoughts of teaching him how to ride pushed aside when it let to things like this. He was not scared to be hurt, he was simply worried - an all-devouring worry that threatened to override him if he allowed it to.

But JR needed him now, no matter how weird it might sound to his ears. Gently, he patted the other boy’s shoulder before he moved and took out his wand, carefully pushing JR’s shirt aside in order to reach the skin underneath. “I, uhm. I can’t heal it but it will take the pain away for a while,” he explained quietly, while not mentioning what he was going to do. Yet he did not wave his wand - instead, the tip of the wood touched the lion’s skin as he drew the sharp lines on it, the sign that vaguely resembled a regular B as the rune Berkano was a part of it, with few adjustments. In combination with other runes, Erik was sure it could heal - yet like this, it was only meant to dull the other’s pain because the eagle was no healer and not supposed to mess with such things. His fingertips were lightly resting beside the rune for a moment before he took a step back and shoved his wand back where he took it from, before sitting on the floor across from JR again.

It was not like the house elves wouldn’t be able to remove any potential stains in his clothes later on, so he just sat there and waited for JR to reply to his questions. I've seen horrible things. I've endured terrible things. Once more it seemed like Erik was collecting broken things, picking them up from all the corners of the castle and hoarding them underneath his bed. Quincy was broken and had warned him - Tag had been broken, too. Alba was utterly broken - so broken that he had cut himself on her sharp edges in the end. Severin was broken. And JR? He had appeared so steady, but it seemed like he was broken too, ripped at every edge and soaked in gasoline while standing too close to an open fire.

“If you think I’m going to leave now, you’re fucking wrong,” Erik told him, tilting his head at his friend while his finger was drawing random symbols into the sand - the rune on JR’s shoulder repeated, meddled with others and random wave lines. “You don’t have to tell me what this is about if you don’t want to yet - but if you want to, I’ll be there. I’m not running, okay? You probably guessed already my life’s not been butterflies and rainbow even, I can handle it. It’s what friends are for, right?” He pushed himself to his feet again, reaching out his hand to help the lion stand again. “The horse needs to go back. And I’m not letting you climb her again, either.” There was the shade of a crooked smirk on his lips as he looked at his friend again, making sure he would be right here - for once a steady anchor.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 24 2017, 02:24 PM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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627 Posts
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



Dull green eyes watched the eagle as he moved. The pain in his shoulder was a sharp and throbbing annoyance, but it was not something that the lion had not endured before. In fact, the same shoulder had once been broken for three days before any medical help was received for it and when it was, it had been a muggle medical examiner. There had been all sorts of questions for the woman that had authority of the sixteen year old at the time, but after many hours of waiting and then watching them cast his arm, JR knew that all questions had stopped when Kilsha had wiped the memories of the muggle professionals that had put relocated his arm, casted and then put it in a sling. It had been a long summer after sixth year learning how to eat and do things with his left hand. He wondered if he went to the hospital wing now if they'd notice.

Erik lifted his shirt slightly, his touch gentle and warm on his skin, a soft breath escaping him as relief hit with whatever the eagle had done. He wasn't sure, as the younger boy hadn't seemed to cast a spell but at the same time his pain was definitely less - had he drawn something on his skin? JR examined the spot before looking to the eagle, nodding, "That's a handy trick," he breathed more easily now, the adrenaline that had rushed through his body prior seemed to be evaporating from his pores. Licking his lips JR shifted, waiting for a rush of pain but it didn't seem to come. Judging by Erik's words it wasn't yet healed so he was still moving cautiously, but it was certainly better than nothing."Thank you."

Usually, it was JR who was there for people to lean on. After all, that was the dance the two boys sitting in the middle of the pasture had done up until this point. He was always around for Kiss when she needed him, the boy with the running shoes, the girl that had desperately wanted a slide on the staircase, the girl that he had tried to help be able to go out into the sun, or even the boy that just transferred to Hogwarts and had stumbled onto the Room of Requirement without knowing what it was.

His eyes lifted from his shoulder where he had been lost in his thoughts after examining his shoulder to the boy that was now sitting near him. Erik's words were firm without much room to wiggle around or argue - much the way that Kiss's had been when he had revealed pieces of what had happened to her as well. Was his fear that people would leave him or treat him differently that ridiculous? Or had fate selected and put two people in his life that would be there for him after subjecting him to the darkness for years? JR grabbed the boy's hand slightly awkwardly with his left one and pulled himself up, following silently as Erik did his thing with the horse, his eyes watching but his brain not really registering.

After a while, the lion opened his mouth and then closed it once more. Erik certainly wasn't going to tell him again that he could share if he wanted; JR knew that much for sure. That was just the way that the two boys were. With it was a sense of comfort that he only had to reveal what he was ready for, but at the same time, the time had come that JR needed to talk about these things, or explosions might just keep happening. His lip parted once more, not looking at the eagle or the horse, his gaze drifting over the lawns of the school, the wind pushing his hair slightly on his head. He felt cooler, more chilled, but they would be going in soon, and again, it wasn't anything that the lion hadn't endured before. "When my dad died a few years back, I learned my mother was alive - a witch, even. She got custody of me." His gaze turned to the younger boy, swallowing, realizing maybe for the first time the reason that he was so drawn to saving the younger boy after finding him on the corridor floor. "She was an alcoholic. A very mean and awful alcoholic."

@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 25 2017, 05:43 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
16
Height
5'7
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Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



A handy trick was surely a nice description of what Erik had just performed on his friend, and the remark made him smile a little as he twisted his wand in his hands for a moment before shoving it back in his pocket. “Old family trick,” he gave back with a shrug, because it was true - it was the way how the small pains of his childhood had been mended, knowledge passed onto him because Ancient Runes was only an elective at Hogwarts - unlike Durmstrang, where they were taught all these things. It was the only thing that had made Erik ever yearn to be placed there, although everyone in his family had agreed that boys like Erik wouldn’t make it as a school like Durmstrang, Northern blood or not - he would have gone down in a second, crushed by a hierarchy that left no room for him and constricted by rules he did not wish to follow. Everything he knew about runes, he knew from his grandparents and his mother, as rune magic had always been something his father had frowned upon. In fact, it was clearly why Erik wanted to know even more about it - to spite William Dwight.

Once they were both on their feet again, Erik went through the motions of taking care of the horse, still getting used to the feeling that JR was following him around for once. It was so strange, and yet he was capable of distracting himself enough by simply unsaddling the horse again and putting the equipment back where he took it from, rubbing over the mare’s back and body with a bit of hay and feeding some traits to her before closing her box again, a gentle nicker being her way of saying goodbye to the boys who had made her afternoon more troublesome than it could have been. Erik stretched a little, before pushing the box door close again and glancing at JR, not sure if he was still going to receive an answer or not. If he had been asked to bet, he would have said no - both of them were good at dancing around the elephants in the room, although not quite as good as Quincy and him were.

Eventually they all had practised careful avoidance for too long to step out of the vicious circle again. Erik blinked at the sun that was dipping the lawns in a golden afternoon light, almost holding his breath as JR finally spoke and revealed the truth about himself - or at least a part of it. A part Erik had not wanted to hear, as it felt like a stab in the side, a rose thorn in his finger. She was an alcoholic. A very mean and awful alcoholic. Two simple sentences connected all those loose puzzle pieces to a whole picture, everything falling in place all of the sudden. This was why he had been picked up - this was the reason they had become friends. And the eagle could not think of a worse reason to become someone’s friend.

“Maybe you shouldn’t let another alcoholic ruin your life then,” he replied quietly, green gaze wandering towards the grass moving in the wind and the two horses within the second corral that seemed to be playing with each other. He did not want to become a second burden in JR’s life, did not want to hurt this boy who must have been hurt before. Why did the lion do this to himself? Even if Erik kept the drinking in control, there was a part of him that was always willing to relapse and give into the temptations of the poison that could kill him. JR deserved so much better than him, and yet the smaller boy could not bring himself to leave just yet - not after he had promised to stay.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 25 2017, 07:09 AM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
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Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
House
Gryffindor
clash
Neutral
Awards: 34



He followed Erik, present next to him but not really there, as thoughts swirled around in his mind, questions of the future, questions of why events happened to him plaguing the lion. His eyes were sunken, still holding tears that were threatening to expose him to Erik, to the world, that JR Zerner was not as strong as he was thought to be. He held himself together, but when crashes like these came, they came swiftly and they came hard; like a swift wind on a calm day, they left him - and probably others - perplexed and unsure of what to do next. His gaze drifted over the grounds as they walked, moving towards the castle after the eagle had finished putting the mare away. The afternoon was starting to wane into night and there was no one around them.

When JR had spoken of his mother, it hadn't been to hurt Erik. The lion hadn't jumped into rescuing the younger boy because of his past. At least he hadn't consciously. He had seen someone that needed help in the corridors and he had helped them. Of course it had worried him to see the eagle drinking with his boyfriend, but that was only fair, wasn't it? It didn't have to do with his alcoholic mother, what it had to do with was that he wanted the best for Erik. But now, as Erik replied, his words although soft, were like needles to the lion's heart. So much for the younger boy sticking around to actually be here with him. Doubt filled the young man and his gaze stayed steadily on the castle that was coming into view. This was good - he could run away and pretend that things had never happened, but at the same time, he had the nawing feeling that the friendship was about to turn short - if that's really what Erik thought of him, there was no reasons to continue this.

A breath escaped him and he shoved his left hand in his pocket, squinting at Erik, his brow furrowed, a trace of anger shifting into the green eyes. "You know, I trusted you with that. No one else in the freakin' world knows that fact and you just threw it back in my face. If you want to use it as your decent excuse to run, be my guest. But seriously Erik, if that was some light to you that says that I'm only here because of that, then this wasn't exactly the friendship that I had thought it was, anyways." Anger laced the voice of the lion, though he didn't raise his voice. Raised voices weren't something that JR liked, after listening to the high volumes of his mother's voice for three summers straight. He swallowed hard, turning away from the eagle. This was it. This was the end of the path for them.

His thoughts strayed to the mark on his shoulder, the mark that Erik had made. JR didn't have any idea what the mark actually meant, or what it was at all, really, but at the same time it was the last parting gift that he would have from Erik. His mind went to the other gift that Erik had given him and he looked back at the eagle, not having realized that his strides had carried him past Erik in his anger. His voice was softer, more hurt now, a single tear running down his face as he wiped at it, irritated. "I'll return your broom, too. I'm sorry I inconvenienced you." His heart was torn into pieces in this moment - this was the reason for everything. That he didn't have friends, that he ran, that the the lion wore glamour charms, and the reason he certainly didn't tell anyone about the horrors.

It ruined everything.

@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 25 2017, 08:03 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
Tine
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3964 Posts
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Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
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Height
5'7
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Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



It was a two-heartbeat decision, the silence between the lightning and the thunder - words spilled as carelessly as a hand accidentally shoving over a jar of ink. The consequence was often so much worse than the act itself, and Erik felt his stomach twisting as he looked at what he had done. He wished he had not raised his gaze to look at JR’s face again, unsure what he was going to find there. His words had not been meant to free himself of the other’s company - please, he wasn’t so sure if he would be still here to let the sun shine on his face if it had not been for the lion saving him on that one peculiar night. But those who had been hurt once often liked to take a phrase and twist it until they could cut themselves on the sharp edges, only to show their bleeding wounds to their opponents. The small eagle just had not expected JR to take his words and twist them into something so dark.

Erik could see the anger even before it hit him, words bearing the same force a slap in the face could - and oh, the boy had been on the receiving end of both these things. . If you want to use it as your decent excuse to run, be my guest. But seriously Erik, if that was some light to you that says that I'm only here because of that, then this wasn't exactly the friendship that I had thought it was, anyways. He felt sick to the core, his stomach twisting while his hands in the pockets of his jacket were shaping fists. Why did people always deliberately misunderstand what he wanted to tell them? Did he speak a different language when he was trying to tell them they did not need to take care of him just because they felt the obligation, that they did not need his darkness and chaos in their lives if they did not want it? He felt like stomping his foot and yelling, but instead he sensed the lump in his throat and the burning sensation in his eyes.

If only there were runes to mend a broken heart, he would somehow manage to apply them on himself and stop the constant heartache from strangling him over and over again. JR was the one who left - whether it was because he had taken Erik’s advice or was simply angered by his words. I'm sorry I inconvenienced you. With his lips parted, the Swede watched him for a moment - only to run after him, pale fingers digging into the much taller boy’s arm. “Can you not be such a fucking asshole?” he asked quietly, still not raising his voice or showing how hurt he was. “Now you make it sound like you want me to leave - which is fine, ‘cause I just said that it might be better not to burden yourself with another person who can’t fucking deal with themselves, you know? But don’t ever accuse me of needing excuse to leave - if I wanted to leave, I wouldn’t try and find an excuse for it.”

The hand that brushed a single pale strand of hair out of his face was trembling, and he tried to ignore it - as well as the burning in his eyes, the furious blinking that tried to keep the tears from falling. He had cried in front of too many people already, he was not going to do it in front of JR now. It was the reason why he gave the boy a shove with the hand that has been holding onto his arm before turning away - just in time for the familiar, salty moisture on his face.

@JR Zerner

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JR Zerner
 Posted: Mar 25 2017, 08:45 AM
Quote
"Always Runnin'"
Kenz
Offline
She/her
627 Posts
Rep: 11 pts
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Group
Gryffindor Novice
Age
17
Height
6'1"
Status
Halfblood
Year
7th
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Maybe this was why two broken hearted people didn't match up together very well. Maybe this instance was a sign that the two boys should walk away from each other; each with their own problems, their own confusion and hurt. What was left here to be said other than more pain that they could inflict upon one another? Yet JR fell rooted to the ground suddenly, like his apology had made a tree root come and wrap around his ankles, pinning him to that spot in the pathway between the stables and the castle that was behind him at this point; as he stood watching the eagle. Memories flickered at him, cutting him to the core. Helping Erik to the room of requirement, having hope and the feeling that this could be what it was like to have a sibling - something that JR had never desired before. What about the kitchens, where the two boys had laughed and Erik had convinced him to join the Quidditch team? What about the hugs that were shared, both then and in the darkness of Ravenclaw tower? The laughter in his own voice as he had sung Hakuna Matata to the younger boy that knew nothing of the pleasures of Disney movies.

Yet, they stood now, only a couple feet apart and to the lion it felt as if a lake had just sprung up between them. He found that his left hand was clenched after wiping away the tear on his forearm, that his breathing was once more coming just a tad bit faster as the anger pierced his heart. It wouldn't be the first time someone had left the young man - the first being his father that died in the first place. With that thought, his brow furrowed further. It wasn't his father's fault that he had died, of course but for the first time, he wondered if he blamed Joe Zerner for the unfortunate events in his life that had spiraled since then. It would have to be something that was tucked away for a later time, however, because right now he was still facing the eagle that JR had thought to be his friend.

The fingers that were clenching his arm, putting pressure into his skin, the quiet voice that told so much more than Erik was willing to let on. JR was not used to people acting like this. Of course, the young man was used to being called such words and many others, but not in a soft voice that was clearly more hurt than angry. He licked his lips, green eyes meeting green eyes, stunned still for a moment. Which was why he was not prepared for the small shove that Erik gave him. Not that it really did anything other than rock JR on the balls of his heels. The smaller boy wasn't attempting to really hurt him, had just responded to JR's words of shoving a wedge between them.

Licking his lips, feeling the wetness on them as he watched his friend - or former friend, at this point? - JR's fingers clenched into a fist and then released them again. This was not Erik's fault. This was the lion's own undoing and the hurt look in the eagle's eyes was proof that when JR couldn't handle things anymore, others got hurt. Swallowing hard, he surveyed the younger student cautiously. With Erik's words and actions, something else had triggered within the Gryffindor. New thoughts needed to be examined and pondered.

Erik hadn't been trying to use anything as an excuse to leave. JR had taken it that way because of his own problems and now it had caused pain to one of the two people that actually might want to be around him. Or had, anyways. Fingers lifted to run through his hair with the arm that that wasn't hurt and he sighed softly. Erik had been merely trying to help the lion in a way and protect JR from more hurt because the truth that lingered between them unsaid was that an alcoholic had caused JR great pain and although the eagle was not that same alcoholic, he was a recovering alcoholic.

JR found himself moving forward in the moments that lapsed where the smaller boy had turned away from him. His arms wrapped around Erik from behind, hiding the twinge of pain that came from moving his right arm, since the rune had not completely taken it away; only dulled it. Not everyone in his life was trying to leave him and the eagle was proof of hat; Erik only wanted what was best for him. Tears came then, and JR let them begin to fall as he held the younger boy, his voice cracking, "You're stuck with me, too." Working on his own problems was hard. It caused him to run. But here, in this moment? Erik needed him and that was something that JR could do.

@Erik Dwight

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Erik Dwight
 Posted: Mar 25 2017, 11:33 AM
Quote
"I'll be your breath if you can be mine."
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Offline
She/Her
3964 Posts
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Group
Ravenclaw Advanced
Age
16
Height
5'7
Status
Pureblood
Year
6th
House
Ravenclaw
clash
neutral
Awards: 65



Friendships usually had high and lows - much like every other relationship. And even in Erik’s idealised world where people could be placed onto a podest only to be shoved down again in an instant, there were highs and lows. With Severin the bad days were always stronger than the good ones, and with Quincy, Erik always wished that the good days were stronger than the bad ones. His life in general had a tendency to take a wrong turn, to break bridges rather than building him - and this exact situation was just a proof for it. A few words carelessly tossed at JR, and here they were at two paths crossing. Would they part ways or walk on together? Had all these feelings of strange familiarity and those hugs meant nothing? Erik would not be surprised - he was used to people walking out of his life, no matter if it had been his own father or just those people he spent a night with and never talked to again. With the latter, he had at least the marks on his skin, tracing them carefully in front of mirrors in the next morning.

The shove he gave the lion felt like throwing pebbles at a tree - no harm done, no impact caused. He had not even meant to cause any kind of pain or throw him over. Could he really blame JR for the reaction when his own abandonment issues were so bad? Erik stared into those green eyes and wondered what he could do or say to undo these last minutes, to make sure that everything was alright. The small eagle was always fast to blame himself for everything that was happening around him, to take the blame rather than having others turn their back on him. He knew that he would shatter if JR walked away now and left him - it would have the same impact on him as throwing him to a pack of wolves and expecting him to survive. Erik Dwight was no fighter - he was just a boy who couldn’t deal with conflict, and who sure as hell could not deal with being left behind.

He was biting his lip until he could taste blood - a bad habit no one ever stopped him from - and almost shrieked as arms wrapped around him from behind, his whole body tensing up in instinctive defence. But then he relaxed again, inhaling that scent that became more and more familiar and cautiously reaching out to pet the arm that was wrapped around him. “Good. ‘Cause I’m not going anywhere,” Erik gave back, his voice hoarse as he closed his eyes and leaned into the hug, hearing that JR was crying more than actually seeing it. He did not need or want to see it, because it wouldn’t change anything. He also did not care whether anyone saw them like this, in this strange position - two broken boys whose matching pieces fit well enough to make up for the damage that had been done.

“Not everyone wants to leave you, JR. You’re not getting rid of me now. But we should get you to the Hospital Wing anyway. And then...then we can talk more, if you want to.” Erik whispered to his friend, his hand still resting on his arm while he focused on the warmth of the hug, the bodies touching in ways that had nothing to do with attraction - and he needed every moment of it to recharge, needed it to take the reins in his hand for once and make sure that JR would be okay again, no matter how much darkness he claimed to carry around with him. That was what friends were for, after all.

@JR Zerner

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